Chuh... as if we'd be up that late anyhow. Caribou closes at 11pm.
Monday, October 30, 2006
Driving a Shift - and I don't mean a manual transmission..
Buried in an article about trends in the Finance pages of the NY Times is a powerful quote:
“We are perhaps on the first step to a matriarchal society; women will earn more money than men if current trends continue by 2028,” said Michael J. Silverstein of the Boston Consulting Group. “The trend has been escalating in the last 10 years as there has been a gradual, slow erosion of the power balance in the family, a psychic rebalancing.”
NY Times Article Link here
Women, Mr. Silverstein added, are “controlling purchases and driving a shift in our economy.”
So. If this is true..
CARIBOU COFFEE I AM A WOMAN - LISTEN TO ME! I am driving a shift in the economy!
You should ALWAYS, I repeat ALWAYS have Mango Iced Tea available. Every location, every day. That Irish Breakfast and Pepppermint - that's crap.
Brew mango iced tea daily, please. Otherwise you will miss out on hundreds, maybe even thousands of dollars of my purchases annually.
Thank you.
“We are perhaps on the first step to a matriarchal society; women will earn more money than men if current trends continue by 2028,” said Michael J. Silverstein of the Boston Consulting Group. “The trend has been escalating in the last 10 years as there has been a gradual, slow erosion of the power balance in the family, a psychic rebalancing.”
NY Times Article Link here
Women, Mr. Silverstein added, are “controlling purchases and driving a shift in our economy.”
So. If this is true..
CARIBOU COFFEE I AM A WOMAN - LISTEN TO ME! I am driving a shift in the economy!
You should ALWAYS, I repeat ALWAYS have Mango Iced Tea available. Every location, every day. That Irish Breakfast and Pepppermint - that's crap.
Brew mango iced tea daily, please. Otherwise you will miss out on hundreds, maybe even thousands of dollars of my purchases annually.
Thank you.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Thank You Holly
Every photo of me or my family that I have that I love has been taken by my dear friend Holly. I love this photo so much.. it was me saying goodbye to Mr. Man just before Holly and I went to go see a live Prairie Home Companion show.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Thou Shall Not Brake-Check
Let me set the scene for you.
It's a chilly fall morning and I have my mojo working. My daughter gets dropped off at school with nary a sniffle or even a "Mommy, one more hug please.." (this is a BIG deal - she has JUST started being happy at drop off just this week, and its a BIG improvement over her tearful drop offs up till now).
I'm wearing my new fave jeans and trusty kimono wrap sweater to work and favorite courdory fall jacket. I'm not late for work - and I'm looking forward to sipping my iced tea and nibbling my oatmeal bites as I drive the van downtown.
I flick on the heated seats, crank up the stereo and get to enjoy my favorite song of all time by the Rave-ups - newly burned onto CD for me from the LP. I sip my iced tea, nod my head to Jimmer Podransky and cruise through the Bunker Hills Park. The fall leaves are stunning, the sun is coming up and it's a BEAUTIFUL day.
My commute is going smooth as silk, my tunes have me in such a good mood I'm thinking to myself: "I should pick up the cell phone and tell Hubby I haven't been this happy since our OB/GYN offered to induce Mr. Man's birth 4 weeks early.."
And then this ass-hat in a White Subaru (it wasn't an anniversary edition, no offense Duf) decides he wants to be in the lane I'm in, starts to pull into the side of my van and I honk and brake. I let him in ('cause it's either that or get the van repainted - AGAIN) and then.. get this - he BRAKE CHECKS ME. He's pissed that I honked (to let him know he's about to hit me!) and he STANDS on his brakes about 1000 feet short of the red light (and next vehicle) ahead. So, of course, to avoid an accident (lanes on either side of us are occupied) I have to lock up my brakes, too. AND still I nearly skid into him. Damnable Subaru brakes must be better than my brand new Nissan brakes.
EVERYTHING in my van dumps. My tea, my backpack, my kids toys in the back, my oatmeal bites. It's all over the front of the floor up right up under the gas pedal.
So I called 911 and reported the #$%*er.
Dear Mr. Subaru driver,
Yes. I saw that you rolled your window down and tried to drive even with me when the traffic in the left lane I was in (after I got the heck away from you) sped by your car.
Yes, I noticed you tried to get my attention - but I didn't look at you or slow down to hear whatever you had to say because I was busy REPEATING YOUR PLATE NUMBER to the nice officer that called me back. Yes, I noticed you brake checked that other guy, too. Hopefully he called 911 also. Apparently you have a Road Rage problem.
I hope when the next time you get pulled over for speeding or DUI or whatever other driving infraction that the officer looks at the computer and sees the calls from other motorists reporting your behavior. Or, better yet, that the Coon Rapids and/or Fridley Police dept. had time this morning to pull you over and admonish you for aggressive driving.
I hope you know you ruined my otherwise idyllic morning commute - and I hope you know that karma is a bee-yotch and so please don't be surprised when you have that flat tire tonight.
As for me, I just cranked up the Rave-ups and took some deep breaths.
Life's too short - and my commute is too damn long.
It's a chilly fall morning and I have my mojo working. My daughter gets dropped off at school with nary a sniffle or even a "Mommy, one more hug please.." (this is a BIG deal - she has JUST started being happy at drop off just this week, and its a BIG improvement over her tearful drop offs up till now).
I'm wearing my new fave jeans and trusty kimono wrap sweater to work and favorite courdory fall jacket. I'm not late for work - and I'm looking forward to sipping my iced tea and nibbling my oatmeal bites as I drive the van downtown.
I flick on the heated seats, crank up the stereo and get to enjoy my favorite song of all time by the Rave-ups - newly burned onto CD for me from the LP. I sip my iced tea, nod my head to Jimmer Podransky and cruise through the Bunker Hills Park. The fall leaves are stunning, the sun is coming up and it's a BEAUTIFUL day.
My commute is going smooth as silk, my tunes have me in such a good mood I'm thinking to myself: "I should pick up the cell phone and tell Hubby I haven't been this happy since our OB/GYN offered to induce Mr. Man's birth 4 weeks early.."
And then this ass-hat in a White Subaru (it wasn't an anniversary edition, no offense Duf) decides he wants to be in the lane I'm in, starts to pull into the side of my van and I honk and brake. I let him in ('cause it's either that or get the van repainted - AGAIN) and then.. get this - he BRAKE CHECKS ME. He's pissed that I honked (to let him know he's about to hit me!) and he STANDS on his brakes about 1000 feet short of the red light (and next vehicle) ahead. So, of course, to avoid an accident (lanes on either side of us are occupied) I have to lock up my brakes, too. AND still I nearly skid into him. Damnable Subaru brakes must be better than my brand new Nissan brakes.
EVERYTHING in my van dumps. My tea, my backpack, my kids toys in the back, my oatmeal bites. It's all over the front of the floor up right up under the gas pedal.
So I called 911 and reported the #$%*er.
Dear Mr. Subaru driver,
Yes. I saw that you rolled your window down and tried to drive even with me when the traffic in the left lane I was in (after I got the heck away from you) sped by your car.
Yes, I noticed you tried to get my attention - but I didn't look at you or slow down to hear whatever you had to say because I was busy REPEATING YOUR PLATE NUMBER to the nice officer that called me back. Yes, I noticed you brake checked that other guy, too. Hopefully he called 911 also. Apparently you have a Road Rage problem.
I hope when the next time you get pulled over for speeding or DUI or whatever other driving infraction that the officer looks at the computer and sees the calls from other motorists reporting your behavior. Or, better yet, that the Coon Rapids and/or Fridley Police dept. had time this morning to pull you over and admonish you for aggressive driving.
I hope you know you ruined my otherwise idyllic morning commute - and I hope you know that karma is a bee-yotch and so please don't be surprised when you have that flat tire tonight.
As for me, I just cranked up the Rave-ups and took some deep breaths.
Life's too short - and my commute is too damn long.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Managerial Insight by Parable
Yesterday I gave another Toastmasters speech. For this one I was expected to use stories or fables to illustrate my point.
The "moral" of my speech essentially was: Politics in the office are inevitable and 90% of job satisfaction (or more) is based on whether we enjoy our work atmosphere. So, you have to laugh. Have To. When work gets absurd, you have to laugh it off -- because we all know there are days our worklife imitates the TV show: "The Office" or a Dilbert strip. And you have to laugh to keep from crying.
To illustrate my point I told these three parables (though I admit I cleaned them up for a G -rated delivery in the actual speech -- you'll figure out how if you read on). I think these must be internet humor .. a friend forwarded them to me in an email last year sometime and they tickled me so much I held onto them.
Parable One
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson : To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Parable Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson - Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Parable Three
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson #3 -
(1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut.
The "moral" of my speech essentially was: Politics in the office are inevitable and 90% of job satisfaction (or more) is based on whether we enjoy our work atmosphere. So, you have to laugh. Have To. When work gets absurd, you have to laugh it off -- because we all know there are days our worklife imitates the TV show: "The Office" or a Dilbert strip. And you have to laugh to keep from crying.
To illustrate my point I told these three parables (though I admit I cleaned them up for a G -rated delivery in the actual speech -- you'll figure out how if you read on). I think these must be internet humor .. a friend forwarded them to me in an email last year sometime and they tickled me so much I held onto them.
Parable One
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson : To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Parable Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson - Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Parable Three
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson #3 -
(1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut.
Quote Happy
Yesterday, in preparation for my speech I went looking for some quotes to tie in with my topic of humor in the workplace.
Here a few of my favorites:
'If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.'
'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.'
'You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.'
'I don't suffer from stress, but I am a carrier.'
Here a few of my favorites:
'If you are good, you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.'
'Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.'
'You are slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.'
'I don't suffer from stress, but I am a carrier.'
Monday, October 02, 2006
Glad Monday is Over
Monday struck me as an odd day. For one thing, it didn't go very smoothly for our little family.
After a night of getting up 3 times with 2 of the kids (and believe me, I explained to the 9 year old that if she wakes up at 2am and needs to pee, she really doesn't have to wake me up and tell me that first)...the morning came far too soon.
The kids dawdled, I grew even later for work. Every lane I chose became the "slow lane". I was a full hour later for work than I should have been.
When I reached my desk I realized I'd left my backpack/briefcase in the car. When I went back out to the car I found that our oldest daughter had left her bottled water and packed lunch in the van. (And by then it was 10:30 am, and I couldn't have reached her at her elementary school nearly and hour to the north in time..) I was singing to myself: "Just one of them days..." and trying not to worry. It's just a Monday.
At lunch, I found this really interesting article at the NY Times:
Good article at: Link
The idea that children are a loan and a gift from God and that our job is to train them up to leave us (their parents) is one I can whole heartedly agree with.
Then the school shooting in Pennsylvania Amish country hit the news. I remember thinking: It's official. There is really no "safe" place anymore.
And if there is no safe place - the temptation to try to keep my children close, to try to keep them "safe at home" is stronger than usual.
But then I remind myself that I cannot support their growth into independent, self-relient young people if I shelter them exceesively. I'm a worry-wart by nature.. but I fight it constantly because I don't want to pass my fears onto the kids.
I felt very tired and like I'd run a marathon at the end of Monday. Relieved to be home with the kids - but not sure how I could keep up the pace. After a good night's sleep I realize all that I can do is get up and do it all over again.
Is it too Polly-Anna to say that after a short night of sleep I have hope in the new day again? That I realize I have to live life and let the kids go to school and simply have faith... Faith that today will be a better day. That the kids will be safe at school. That as a reaction to the growing violence people will work harder to keep guns from unstable people who shouldn't have access to them. That my children will grow up and they and their peers will seek peace and diplomacy not war.
Yes, maybe I'm too Polly-Anna. But I'd rather have this optimism to start each day then the sort of exhausted pessimism I felt just before falling asleep on Monday night.
After a night of getting up 3 times with 2 of the kids (and believe me, I explained to the 9 year old that if she wakes up at 2am and needs to pee, she really doesn't have to wake me up and tell me that first)...the morning came far too soon.
The kids dawdled, I grew even later for work. Every lane I chose became the "slow lane". I was a full hour later for work than I should have been.
When I reached my desk I realized I'd left my backpack/briefcase in the car. When I went back out to the car I found that our oldest daughter had left her bottled water and packed lunch in the van. (And by then it was 10:30 am, and I couldn't have reached her at her elementary school nearly and hour to the north in time..) I was singing to myself: "Just one of them days..." and trying not to worry. It's just a Monday.
At lunch, I found this really interesting article at the NY Times:
Good article at: Link
The idea that children are a loan and a gift from God and that our job is to train them up to leave us (their parents) is one I can whole heartedly agree with.
Then the school shooting in Pennsylvania Amish country hit the news. I remember thinking: It's official. There is really no "safe" place anymore.
And if there is no safe place - the temptation to try to keep my children close, to try to keep them "safe at home" is stronger than usual.
But then I remind myself that I cannot support their growth into independent, self-relient young people if I shelter them exceesively. I'm a worry-wart by nature.. but I fight it constantly because I don't want to pass my fears onto the kids.
I felt very tired and like I'd run a marathon at the end of Monday. Relieved to be home with the kids - but not sure how I could keep up the pace. After a good night's sleep I realize all that I can do is get up and do it all over again.
Is it too Polly-Anna to say that after a short night of sleep I have hope in the new day again? That I realize I have to live life and let the kids go to school and simply have faith... Faith that today will be a better day. That the kids will be safe at school. That as a reaction to the growing violence people will work harder to keep guns from unstable people who shouldn't have access to them. That my children will grow up and they and their peers will seek peace and diplomacy not war.
Yes, maybe I'm too Polly-Anna. But I'd rather have this optimism to start each day then the sort of exhausted pessimism I felt just before falling asleep on Monday night.
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