Do as I say, not as I do...

I was in a waiting room somewhere and picked up a parenting magazine (we only subscribe to junk like People and Esquire at our house - that and hubby gets every Car magazine known to man). The article on how to help siblings get along really had some good tips, so I jotted them down. Here's the advice from the article - followed by how I probably handled it in real life.

What to Say When Siblings Fight:

1. The Advice:
Tell the kids: "I can't wait to hear how you solve this. Go into this room and don't come out until you agree on a solution."

The reality: Girls scream in the downstairs toy room for more than 5 minutes and the little one comes up crying and tattling with the big one on her heels yelling angrily.

2. The Advice:
Tell the kids: "Since you're not having fun, here - come help me fold this laundry."

The reality: Big one rolls her eyes and skulks away. Little one asks: "How much will you PAY me?"

3. The Advice:
Tell the kids: "You can either stop fighting of pay me to listen. $.25 a scream."

The reality: Big one says: "You still owe me six bucks!" and storms off in a huff. The little one sticks around to tearfully attempt to tattle on her older sister.

4. The Advice:
Tell the kids: "Looks like that toy needs a timeout - it made you fight. We'll get it out again later."

The reality: Typically, they aren't fighting over toys anymore these days. I can take away the computer - that works. When it's clothes they're fighting over I usually err on the side of whoever fits it best. So, when the big sister complains that little sister is wearing her shirt I usually say: "Well, look it fits her - so it can't fit you properly." Soon it'll be me fighting with the oldest that she's wearing MY shirts. Sigh.

5. The Advice:
Tell the kids: "You guys should be proud. You played together 20 whole minutes before you started arguing. Let's celebrate with a snack."

The reality: Low blood sugar is often a culprit around our house. This one actually works - I send them in to pick out a snack and then pray they don't both want the last one of the same thing.