Monday, August 14, 2006

An Open Letter to the Birthday Princess


The Birthday Girl
Originally uploaded by Geeky Mama.
I've read a lot of posts where people write lovely, funny and heart warming messages on their children's birthdays, or even just monthly recaps as their child reaches 23 months, 27 months, etc.

I've got the antidote to that right here. Check out the attitude on our darling oldest child at her birthday party this past weekend.

Now, to her credit, this is not her usual demeanor. She is a sweet child with a loving heart, a tad on the dramatic side, and full of funny. She cracks me up constantly. (For evidence, see my Sunday, May 21, 2006 post for stories about Em's amazing sense of humor)

However, on this particular day - she was either overtired or her little sister had just pushed her buttons or she was experiencing a little low-sugar induced mood alteration (or all 3).. and she was NOT a happy camper.

In fact, for all our planning and the fun (and expensive) treats we'd planned we were told angrily and tearfully that she was having the (and I quote) "WORST BIRTHDAY EVER!!!!!!". Honestly, after all the effort and expense.. it was a bit hard to hear that. It was hard to hear her complaints, because we knew it wasn't that the party was bad, it was that she couldn't stand that she got a "time out" during her own party.

And this is where I must write my birthday greeting to Princess Emma on the occasion of her 9th birthday...

Dear Em, Monkey Butt, Darling Girl,

This year marks the 8th year I have lit birthday candles on your cake. You have outgrown Teletubbies, Dinosaurs and even Barbie cakes. You have grown so tall and your feet are nearly the same size as mine. You are starting to care about your outfits and hair styles and yet... you are still a little girl.
You will hate me for pointing it out to you, but my dear, you are still your mother's, father's and mine to care for and to protect and cherish... and therefore we will continue to make your life miserable for at least the next 9 years, too.

We will continue to give you time outs, set limits and give you consequences, even during your birthday party.
You can scream, pinch, throw things and call us names - and you'll think your words aren't hitting their targets because we will remain calm and to repeat ourselves in a calm voice. (Or die trying to appear calm.)

However, we do this because we love you. We are trying to teach you so that as you grow into a beautiful young woman your heart and your actions will be as beautiful (or even more beautiful) than your long flowing blond hair and crystal blue eyes.

Despite the looks of this picture, I have real hope that even as a difficult teenager that the REAL contents of your heart will be powerfully beautiful. Even if you are, as you put it: "practically a pre-teenager".. I know that there are still times you'll want to crawl into my lap and be held.

Here is how I know you are growing up to be beautiful:
I see it in how you treat others when you think we're not watching. How you readily pitch in and help smaller children. I see in how you convict me to help total strangers - because you've noticed they need help even if I've been too busy to notice.
I see it in your generous heart. You give easily and constantly. You will extend a hand of friendship with any other child you encounter ---Em, you make friends as naturally as you breathe in and out.

I see it when you honestly just feel for other people. You call it like you see it: "That's just mean!" or "She should share that..." -- you're right, and it shows your heart is in the right place.

Em, even when you're telling me I'm an evil stepmother and even when you scream that you hate me - I know, deep down, that you love me... and I hope you always know that I love you. Always. No matter what. Even when I'm mad, sad or disappointed - even when I'm telling you to go take a time out. I still love you more than you can know.

And lastly, if I could have a wish for you - I'd wish that this actually WAS the worst birthday you ever have.. because then I know you'd be having some amazingly happy years ahead.

Much love,
Your evil stepmother

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Nice post Carolyn! Emma is lucky to have you in her life.